Bury the Hatchet

I am sure you have heard the phrase 'bury the hatchet.'   In fact, Garth Brooks sings a great song about that, but mentions leaving the handle sticking out.  Do you know what it means or where the phrase comes from?

"Bury the hatchet' means to settle your difference with an adversary.  The phrase has been around much earlier, possibly earlier than the recorded 1644.  It originated as an early American Indian tradition. Hatchets were buried by the chiefs of the tribes when they came to a peace agreement. The farther in the depths of the earth the hatchet was thrown, the longer the peace would last. http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/bury-the-hatchet.html

I guess this word can equal forgiveness, acceptance, tolerance, and maybe patience with those around us.  Especially those that have offended us in some way--real or imagined.

I am not immune to leaving the handle sticking out.  I have worked for years on a couple of my hatchets.  In fact, some of these hatchets used to be pots of stew simmering on the back burner and would turn into boiling over, scalding, hot lava on occasion.  They have magically morphed into hatchets and many I have buried for good.

I will give you an example from my life so you can maybe look into yours and see what pots of stew or hatchets you may have lurking about maybe causing damage to yourself or others--mainly yourself.  This kind of baggage just sits around dragging you down day after day festering and rotting your soul.

In high school gym class was the first time my MS flared up.  I had a gym teacher who also was the track coach so most of our classes were spent running and running.  One day, my right leg just gave out, turned to jello, and I hit the hard cement floor.  I tried to get back up, but my leg wouldn't support my weight, and I collapsed back down.  Meanwhile, all my classmates kept running by me.

Now, in this class, I had no friends.  I had some how managed to get assigned to the class with all the popular kids.  I was in the smart/drama clique and this class was full of  jocks and cheerleaders. So as they ran by, snide remarks were made about me being on the floor and cleaning it up or trying to get out of running.

The track coach came over and barked orders at me to get up off the floor.  I told him I couldn't.  My leg wasn't working.  He then yelled at the TA to get over and help me up and kept and running. Heaven forbid he should stop his running.  He never stopping running.  The TA came over to me and grab my arm and said, "Get up!"  I told him my leg felt funny and wasn't working.  "It won't hold my weight."  He grabbed my arm and yanked me to my feet.  I promptly fell back down.  He glared at me, grabbed my arm and dragged  me to the side of the gym out of the way of the oncoming runners.  He left me there.

Lucky for me, my leg started working by the time the bell rang, or I might have been there the rest of the day.  No one bothered to check on me after that.

I was humiliated, angry, scared, you name it.  Every emotion known to man went through me then.  I wanted to do something to get back at everyone in that class but knew it was pointless.

I had the leg issue two more times after that at different times (thank goodness never in gym again) and then nothing for 10 more years, but I thought about  it many times.  I wrote about it in my journal; I ranted to Rick about it during the early years we were married; and when I just wanted to be mad, I would grab the handle and swing that hatchet around a bit.

But, why?  Did I like to get my blood pressure up?  Did those people in the class know I had a real problem? Did the coach really know I wasn't one of those girls trying to get out of gym class?  Does it really matter now?   The answer to all those questions is a BIG FAT NO!   So why dwell on it.  I am just going to give myself an ulcer.

And that is what I have decided with hatchets.   They don't matter to any one but me or you.  They cause stress, fights, family feuds, ulcers and other health problems.  So it was time to move on.

So what about you?  How many hatchets do have?  Do you need to bury some or rebury some? With this year barely underway, I think it is time for us to bury the hatchet!